Will today be the day? (Thursday, Jan. 19, 2006)

It's 08:34 and so far, nothing bad has happened today. Decided to cancel my trip to Paris as my toe is really smarting today (and I had visions of it being a remake of the film "Final Destination", but could today actually be the end of our disaster phase? Even my dreams were less apocalyptic, last night I dreamt I was in a storage facility with lots of filing cabinets. Then everyone from the office appeared and we had to grab a filing cabinet each. Inside each one was a variety of weapons, and then we had to push our filing cabinets around with our weapons stabbing and bludgeoning each other until we were the last ones left alive.

OK, so mildly apocalyptic but at least contained to the people I work with rather than the whole world. It was like Battle Royale (the cool Japanese flick) would have turned out if it had been set in an office instead of an island.

Well we finally got the sofa in the house, thanks to the loft builders. They made it their personal challenge to get the thing in the house, and were not going to be deterred by doors, door frames, or even garage walls as it turned out. Yes, by dismantling half of our house (what remains of our house after destroying our roof) they got the sofa into the lounge. And it only took 4 hours.

Time for another list. This time, the top 10 things you don't want to over hear your builders saying, thanks to Billy and Matt for providing the material (unwittingly):-


10. In 25 years of building I've never seen anything like that
9. ut oh
8. If we plaster over that bit, they'll never notice, well not until it starts to smell any way
7. Thank god this isn't my house
6. Excuse me mate,is your toilet meant to fill to the brim when you flush it?
5. Next time their neighbour scowls at us do ya reckon we should moon her?
4. It's nice to think that the client is paying you to take a dump in their own toilet
3. Insulation, cardboard, what's the difference really?
2. The only way they can sell this as a bedroom is if a family of midgets look to move into this street

and my personal favourite....

1. AAAAAAAAAAH, BILLY! I'VE NAILED MY FOOT TO THE FLOOR, CALL A BLOODY AMBULANCE!! (whilst waving smoking nail gun around)

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